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Reviewer: myy Signed [Report This]
Date: 19/04/18 - 03:25 am Title: Prolog

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Reviewer: The Didact Signed [Report This]
Date: 17/11/13 - 10:49 pm Title: Reawakening

Hey man. Great job again. Sorry for the long absence. Work has been a bit time consuming but I am now coming out with a new story I think you would like. Feel free to read and review and I will get to work on revising chapter 4 of rage. Keep going bud!

Reviewer: The Didact Signed [Report This]
Date: 03/10/13 - 09:39 pm Title: Prolog

Alright, sorry for the long wait. My new story kept me busy. I have reviewd chapter three and it needs some work. You need to get this plot moving or else readers will get bored. The action is a little full and needs to be spiced up. I suggest adding romance to the next chapter of you can. These chapters are simply to short. The word count barly brakes 500. Notice every one of my chapters has at least 1,600 words. Don't be afraid of a chapter being to long. Readers like a long story. Especially if the story is good. You are doing great! 

Reviewer: The Didact Signed [Report This]
Date: 19/09/13 - 07:03 pm Title: Spellcheck

Good but still to short. As co-author, I have the option to edit the story. I won't change anything but I will try to lengthen the chapters a bit and fix a few spelling errors. Your doing good!



Author's Response:

Thanks for the help. I kinda wanted to make the story go the way I wanted it to, so please just try not to write anything that can alter a chapter entirely. As I write the chapters, I think up new stuff for the next chapter, so anything crucial to the story might throw me off. Please if you do anything, just make the chapters longer and just add some new details to it. Nothing personal. Thanks! Bro hoof!

- Brony king

Reviewer: The Didact Signed starhalf-star [Report This]
Date: 19/09/13 - 07:34 am Title: Prolog

Not bad at all. It did seem a little short though. Try adding more detail and more plot, like a conversation between Twilight and Fluttershy before the spell. Also consider adding a little more confusion from the "figure" and from Fluttershy. Shy just went through a portal and that hasn't seemed to concern anyone to much. This is a good start though!

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